Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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