I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
