I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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