So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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