you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
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You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?