I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize
