fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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