just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Boobs are out for the taking
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
