Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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