She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
The air taste purple.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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