i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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