lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize