So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
