oh god the rape fog is back!
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
