Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
