Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
My brain says no but my pants say off.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
