i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
