Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
