Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize