Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You took a bar mat shot.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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