You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
