I skipped work to stalk him.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
