sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Randomize
