And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
