i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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