i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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