4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
