I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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