kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize