Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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