it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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