Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
