I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
try to milk me bitch
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
