Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize