I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I wish they made helmets for livers.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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