the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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