Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
