and next time when you feel me up, do it right
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
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I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
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Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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