a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
