I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I forget how to act sober
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