u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
