Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
