I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
you never un-have a 4some
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
