I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize