We're like a lot better than the average bears
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
