another moral hangover. fuck.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize