You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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