I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
