in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..