margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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